10 Agustus 2010

The Beginning of our Battle with Ourselves


Dear readers, especially the moslem ones. We have come to the month we have been waiting for. The month where we can experience joy and struggle to be a better person afterwards. It's Ramadhan.

Moslem people welcome it in various ways. Some express their joy by making activities in Masjids. Some express it by sending messages implying their request for apologizes they may make to others. Some do it by posting it in their social-network websites.

But some do it by exploding fireworks.

It happened when people are waiting for the agreement made by Indonesia government to decide whether their moslem people shall do fasting tomorrow or not. When it was decided, the refinery unit of PT Pertamina in Balikpapan blew its whistle as a sign that Ramadhan has been started. Not long ago, not far from the Masjid, there are some people or kids that exploding fireworks. Its sound was shocking. There were not only one explotion. There were repeating numbers of it. It ignited the Masjid caretaker to search for the troublemaker. The search was done in the dark night. Not long after the search, persons in that Masjid could hear the yelling of the caretaker, chasing the troublemaker.

It was a pity, because the troublemaker did it in the moment where there were a lot of jamaah doing the pray. I wonder if they realised what they did. And I believed that the troublemaker is a moslem as well. I wonder which kind of approach the caretaker should make; conservative or parental approach.

These kind of thing have been colouring Indonesia's Ramadhan year by year. I hope we can educate the troublemakers like one I mentioned together.

Can you?

07 Agustus 2010

A glimpse in my Granddad's cemetery

This morning, i went to see my granddad's cemetery. It's the green one among others. Placed in such a dense 'population' of cemetery, I managed to get there by carefully passing through each cemetery. When I got there, it’s already been cleaned up and poured with flowers. They smelled nice. Apparently, a member of the family came not very long before me. So I cleaned up the tiny dust and made a pray.

There are things to remember about this granddad. He was an ex-soldier who wasn’t purposed for battle. As my mother told me, he did the errands for his commander. He drove his commander to the office, drove his commander’s wife to the grocery store, took their kids to school, and many other errands he did. When he got into pension period, he continued his life by doing small-scale civil works; repairing roof, fixing electricity networks, even helping in building my parents’ house. He could fix TVs, radios, motorcycle, and even he drove a local transportation car (angkot). As if there is nothing else he couldn’t do.

He had 6 children. He lived poorly but happily. He struggled to give his kids the best education he can. He wanted to do so to make his kids have a better than his. Well, he managed to get his kids to senior high level; one of them got a diploma. Now, his kids are now grown up and having their own family.

As much as I know, he had no idea in giving up. In the age of 60s, he can do things as if he was only 40 or 50. I’m not saying that he was a workaholic, but all he did, he did it sincerely to help people and for his kids.

I had quite a few memories about him. When I went to school from elementary to senior high, sometimes he pick me up to school if my dad was assigned to another city. Sometimes, he came to our house just to have a chat and brought me and my brother nasi goreng. He gave us advices in unique and cheerful ways. He gave me a long one just before getting into college. As I recalled, he never got mad at us, but he did have mad to my other cousins. He loved us in many ways.

One that I remember the most is when he was ill deeply, it was in 2004. During lebaran, he stayed in my house for awhile, just to get better rest than his house. I didn’t think that that was my last time seeing him. Just when I was ready to depart for college after Lebaran vacation, he suddenly cried like a little child. I tried to cheer him up by saying that I believe I can see him next year. I hug him, confident that he would be okay. I left him to get to the airport. In the next few days, I got news that he passed away. I was speechless. There was a regret that I had in my heart. I regret that I didn’t spend time to show my love and respect to him. I regret that I didn’t give him enough time to say goodbye. I can picture his cry back then until now.

Now, I felt those regret as useless thing to feel. I may regret it until now but not as big as I had a few years ago. That is why I want to move on and showing love to parents and grandparents better than before. I want to be prepared to lose someone dear to heart when their time comes.

These writing come in mind every time I go there. I think that what ziarah is for.